overwhelmed

My appointment today went great. I think. Switched meds added new...ya know the routine. Today I had to confide in my doctor something I hate to admidt. Im dealing with svere depression and severe anxiety.  These emotions are not something new to me but they have progressively gotten worse.
She recommended me to see aa therapist....every nerve in my body clamped shut and my head screamed noooooo absolutely not...I almost began to tear on the spot the very thought of opening myself up to some one luke that scares the living hell out of me. I can open up to my gentle readers because I can't see your face judging me.
I know I need help. I suffer from seasonal depression disorder very badly...it has already begun.
My anxiety levels haven't been good since about late june when I started taking the mirapex. I can't handle people...the only people I can tolorate are the ones im with on a daily basis. I confided to Jeremy that I feel....overwhelmed. and I need help. I need a moment to catch my breath. So I've decided maybe I should seek help.
Another thing that isn't on my good side is im going through withdrawls everytime they switch my medications.  If you have never had withdrawal let me tell you how it goes......
headache
Shakes
sweats
nausea/diarrhea
Body tremors
Severe body aches.

My worste withdrawl was from percoset. It put me in the doctors office bcause I thought my appendix was going to bust. It took two weeks to get over that list of symptoms...I even had to break my o my rule in life and use supositories..... just so id stop vomiting long enough to sleep.

Its brutal. Now with each med change I have slight symptoms....
Headache
Body ache
shakes
Sweats
Ill take that I guess.

Its a rough emotional road im on. Im having more days I want to give up....but I still know I've got do much to look forward to.